Monday and Tuesday.

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Yesterday, I woke up to a glorious autumnal day – blue sky, sunshine and chilliness, and as I was getting ready for the day, I noticed that the heavy, black feelings within me were not at the forefront – it was the sense of sunshine and light that was at the front, and the dark feelings, though still there, were nowhere near as important – and this feeling carried on throughout a lot of the day.

At knitting group, I got talking to M – one of the regular attendees – about this feeling (we got into it through talking about the antidepressants I am on, and their side effect of nausea), and she said some very powerful things to me – in fact, she was my Positive Thing for the day.  She talked about using Affirmations to combat the dark feelings, and advised me to look for them on the internet, write them down on slips of paper, and have one with me each day, to draw on if I need to.  I will most definitely be doing this!

Later on, at choir rehearsal in the evening, I offered a hug to one of the members who is the most friendly, warm and lovely lady, and she warned me to be careful, as hugging me is something she might not want to stop doing.  I said that my physique is well suited to good hugs, but she told me that it is what is inside that makes me so huggable – and that really touched me.  Plus I didn’t automatically dismiss what she said – another positive thing.

I didn’t manage to read any poetry, as I had said I would in Sunday’s post, but I will put it on my list of things to do this week.  The other things include sending our share of the lottery syndicate money to the organiser, emailing the choir AGM minutes to the secretary, for her to email to the members (instead of printing a copy for each member – I suggested to the President that we go paperless), and cold-soaking and breaking in some pairs of shoes that are lovely but not comfortable yet.  We shall see how much I achieve.

Today I allowed myself to have a long lie-in – and ohhh boy did I need and enjoy it!  It is another sunny day, and the lighter feelings are still more powerful than the dark ones.

I’m going to do some more crochet today – I managed to follow the patterns and make two crochet snowflakes yesterday, at knitting group (as well as three more hexagons for my mini-hug blanket), and am feeling quite proud of myself for starting to master reading crochet patterns.  I want to get more hexagons made today, as I am eager to get my mini-hug blanket made.  I do have a number of other projects lined up to do, and I do tend to add projects to the list faster than I complete them.  And I have felt making group tomorrow, so that is more crafting and creating to do this week!  Goody!

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About sdtgcraftygenius

I'm in my late forties, mum of three teenage boys, living near Glasgow. I've been a nurse, studied politics and music at university, and now I am a stay-at-home mother. I've suffered from depression for many years (only recently diagnosed), and take antidepressants daily to keep me on a manageable level.

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