Feeling better.

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This week, with the exception of my pleasure and enjoyment of the school Musical, and of meeting with the mumsnetters on monday, has been a pretty ‘down’ week, but this morning I did feel a bit better, even though I didn’t sleep terribly well last night.  I did, however, have quite a long lie-in this morning, which must have helped.

Despite feeling physically pretty crap yesterday, I did get done the things I wanted to do – wiped over the kitchen surfaces, made lentil soup (and prepared ahead of supper at the same time, marinading chicken and onion in home made teriyaki marinade), and vacuumed through most of the downstairs – and I do feel pleased that I did all of this despite feeling as if I wanted to curl up in front of the tv, and veg all day.

Today, I did some more housework (the house isn’t going to know what hit it, and the children are reeling in shock – lol) – I finished cleaning our bathroom – cleaned the loo, cillit banged the outside of the shower cubicle, and then dried/polished it, so it looked good, and wiped over the sink and the surfaces.

Maddeningly, I do know that I feel good when I achieve something, and I like looking at a room that I have cleaned and/or tidied – even though I know that, unless I shut every other member of the household out of that room permanently, it is going to be messy again before I have had chance to turn round – but knowing this usually isn’t enough to motivate me to do more.

No.  That’s too negative.  I should be feeling good about what I HAVE done, not falling back into the bad habits of self criticism (“Could have done better”).  So forget that paragraph (though I am not going to delete it, because it happened, and better I acknowledge that than try to pretend that the self criticism didn’t creep back in).

To end on a high note – No1 son is home from university today – despite the best efforts of the snow, he made it all the way home from Berkshire, and is now safely ensconced in the bosom of his family – and it is just as well he is here, because Nos 2 and 3 have deserted us – No2 to a ceilidh that is a fundraiser for a friend wanting to do voluntary work in Africa, and will be home later on, and No3 to a party and then a sleep-over at a friend’s house – we should get him back tomorrow sometime, hopefully not hungover! 

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About sdtgcraftygenius

I'm in my late forties, mum of three teenage boys, living near Glasgow. I've been a nurse, studied politics and music at university, and now I am a stay-at-home mother. I've suffered from depression for many years (only recently diagnosed), and take antidepressants daily to keep me on a manageable level.

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