Down, down, down.

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I can feel myself slipping into a depressive slump.  My thoughts are pretty negative at the moment, physically I am more of a wreck than normal, I am very tired all the time (more so than usual), and I am mainlining chocolate whenever I can get my hands on it.

But I have found a free online resource called MoodGym, that is a cognitive behavioural therapy course, and I made a start on it today.  I am not expecting instant results, but I am going to hold onto the first lesson, which was about negative thoughts influencing how I feel.  Though now I am feeling a bit discouraged because I thought I had taken in what it was teaching me today, but I can’t dredge it out of my poor brain at the moment.  That is not because I am a stupid person, though – it is because I am tired and my brain is foggy – and that is not my fault – so maybe I have absorbed the lesson, even if I can’t articulate it.  Confused yet?  You will be!

So lesson 1 is that I am not a bad person, or stupid or a failure.  And I am trying to believe that.

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About sdtgcraftygenius

I'm in my late forties, mum of three teenage boys, living near Glasgow. I've been a nurse, studied politics and music at university, and now I am a stay-at-home mother. I've suffered from depression for many years (only recently diagnosed), and take antidepressants daily to keep me on a manageable level.

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